Summer Abridged

Sadly summer has ended and for a summer-in-review I have compiled a list of the best quotes to come from this summer. Let me know if there are some good ones missing and I will add them.

“Now we have to pass that asshole who yelled that my tire was flat.”
“I’m sorry I called you an asshole.”


“My hand was on fire today.”


“I BEAT ANDY!”


“Do your part, be water smart


“Oh no. The label on the neck of the bottle is gone.”


“I almost died this morning.”


“If my last name was “Do” I would name my son “Ski.”
“If my last name was “Do” I would name my son “Cocka-doodle.”


“Where is she going after this?”
“Home.”
“Where is he going after this?”
“Home.”
“Where are we going after this?”
“Home.”
“Okay, stop asking!”


“Holy Shit! Taki-Mushrooms!”


“Who’s that guy? Oh, it’s Lana.”


“…Katarina Smirnoff and Savage Garden.”


“This isn’t Red Hot, its Kevin Walker.”


“This should come with a pack of Rolaids.”


“And this is a glass of bile.”


“Hey I got a text! It’s from Will!”
“You want to get out of here?”


“Bad kitty.”


“…drink saki out of her ass in front of my grandmother.”


“BRUNO!”


“Look at that downstairs mustache.”


“When gay men have sex they do it anally and sometimes there’s bleeding.”


“Are you still master of your domain?”
“Are you still a virgin?”


“Stop yelling into the speaker.”


“Go fork a bee!”


“Poop licker!”


“We’re here for the gang bang.”


“That says you have really big hands in brail.”